Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Kei-kiang

KEI-KIANG adj. "acting clever"

We have all committed the sins of kei-kiang. Just pick up any work CV. Mine is 96% lies, and 4% facts. It's pretty difficult to lie about your gender and ethnicity.

Sometimes in our hurried effort to impress, we give away minor but clear clues of our sheer stupidity. Just look at these real-life examples of CV bloopers..

"I am very detail-oreinted."

"Married, eight children. Prefer frequent travel."

"Special skills: Thyping."

"I can play well with others."

"Special skills: I've got a Ph.D. in human feelings." **the most kei-kiang statement so far

"Reason for leaving last job: Pushed aside so the vice president's girlfriend could steal my job."

"My ruthlessness terrorized the competition and can sometimes offend."

"Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer."

"Education: College, August 1880 - May 1984."

"Personal Qualities: Outstanding worker; flexible 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year."

"Here are my qualifications for you to overlook."

"My salary requirement is $34 per year."

"I am superior to anyone else you could hire."


Now, don't make those mistakes. And think hard, before you knock on the doors of work opportunity...

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

ROFLMAO.....*peng*

April 12, 2006 4:18 PM  

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