Thursday, April 03, 2008

Do feminist bloggers camwhore?

(Before you start reading the entry, can I just say that I am a male feminist, who is learning to show it more. An incident today triggered this blog reaction)

you may or may not find the following offensive...

Q: How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. It's not the lightbulb that needs changing.

and to balance things...

Q: What is the difference between Government Bonds and men?
A: Government Bonds mature.

Q: Why do women fake orgasm?
A: Because men fake foreplay.

Ok enough.

I just had lunch with someone who invited me to join a feminist movement group. I don't know about you, I always find myself being ultra-conscious and ultra-careful with my words when speaking to someone who openly declares herself as part of a feminist movement (I have only met 7 in my lifetime). Our everyday language is sadly tinged with unintentional sexism and certain feminists can find certain seemingly innocuous topics offensive like credit card shopping and homemaking as a career. She said it's okay to join a feminist movement as male.

I offered an instant reply: a polite, silent nod. *I never said yes (see comment below)

I like opinionated people, be it male and female. I also like people who fight for justice and equality, irrespective of gender, race or religion. But feminists are a different breed altogether.

They often have very specific agendas: they fight for equal pay for equal work, they campaign against domestic abuse, sexual harrassment, reproductive rights etc...

Their demeanour is often seen as strong and even forceful if needed. Even within this feminist movement, there are several schools of thought, you may have heard about the 1st, 2nd and 3rd wave feminist movements. There is one school who seeks to reverse the gender role in (almost) absolutely everything: "if a man can do it, why can't we do it better!"

Just like any other social movement, they can range from acceptable to the downright obnoxious types.

It is this obnoxious type that I get a little uncomfortable. They can find fault in every little thing. Why is God a he not a she? Why is it history and not herstory? They remind me of a child who picks fight at every small detail. Life can't be that fun.

What do you think of feminist movement? Are you part of one? What is the equivalent for males? What do you think of responsibility assignment based on gender?

Personally, I think there should be a healthy compromise between genders, especially those in hetero relationship. Certain sacrifices should not be seen as weaknesses.

I think a better world would be one that is fair, where both sides can agree on role division and sometimes role reversal, because it would be worse if both sides end up confused and indecisive:


7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you are being sucked in my a bunch of nonsense. My wife considers herself a feminist, and does not need anyone or any organization to be one. The same as I don't need one to be a manist. Do you notice how all ads, TV shows, movies, make men out to be stupid? In the U.S., more women than men are enrolled in universities. It will not end until men are dead.

April 03, 2008 10:10 PM  
Blogger Sisuahlai said...

You made a valid point. I was nodding, perhaps more out of politeness than agreement. No, I won't be joining any organisation promoting any specific gender or racial issue.

That is right, most academias are seeing the gender ratio tilting to the other side. Personally, I don't mind if there are more women or more men in any institution, as long as they do their job right and doing it fairly.

Men have dominated most professional fields. If there are women who are keen to redress the balance, I am all for it; so long as it is based on merits! If they want to compete, they deserve equal opportunity. Only fair.

April 03, 2008 10:28 PM  
Anonymous 3POINT8 said...

Yay! We have always been tough, stern and HONEST to a male.
I wonder if we can do that to most people who are enrolled in Uni... Hmmm, better think twice before I venture further.

April 04, 2008 12:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe this silly example helps explain. Coconuts are in short supply. I start "Save the Coconuts". I collect lots of money, and promote Coconut growing. Now we have lots of Coconuts. If I stop, there is no more money. We still need more Coconuts, Always!

April 04, 2008 2:05 AM  
Blogger Dom. said...

Male here... commenting

I personally feel that no matter male/female in life, as long as you have the capability of doing something, by all means go ahead.

Compete-ing in nowadays in society I believe is also that wise. Ppl choose based on capabilities and not on gender. You are more capable so u get the job.

April 04, 2008 2:39 AM  
Blogger naeboo~ said...

sometimes it doesnt matter whether u r male or female. if ur character's shit, u r hated by both equally.

seriously speaking, the differences between man and woman is what makes our relationship interesting. without such differences, it's no longer fun! knowing what the other person is thinking ald all the time makes it so bland.

interestingly, there're men who tell themselves that it's ok to sleep their way up to the top just like women (to be fair, compete equally bla bla bla)
i think using ur charm and some flirting smoothen most things in life, but to the extent of sleeping ur way up is just a matter of ethics, not fighting fair ald.

i forgot what im supposed to talk abt ald. it's too early to debate in the morning.

*continues eating breakfast blueberry pastry*

April 04, 2008 9:35 AM  
Blogger Miss Lime said...

Hahaha... I find this entry uber interesting. I declare myself as a moderate feminist, only to the extend of fighting for the end of sexual abuse, discrimination, etc. I won't go to the extreme of burning my bra, disallowing male chivalry (you know some women disallow men from helping them carry stuff, open doors, etc). I've resigned to the fact that gender equality will never existed. But despite it all, I love being a woman, and will always be more than willing to be pampered by her man (if I had one). =D

June 14, 2010 6:49 PM  

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