How many one night stands make you a stud?

Most women view sex as a prelude to a wonderful, romantic journey, and some men see it as a wonderful conclusion to one. That is the difference; do we really need a research for this? (check out the quote in the article, even the writer couldn't believe the researcher is a professor from Durham Uni)

Football betting kills...

The family decided to tell the story (to the Star) as a lesson for all of us.

Farm manager drinks weed killer after RM90,000 gaming loss

TANJUNG SEPAT: He said he had given up betting on football but the lure of Euro 2008 proved too much for Chuang Toh Huat. In the end, he paid for his love of betting with his life. Some 12 hours after the Spain versus Italy quarterfinal match, he was found in a semi-conscious state after drinking weed killer.

“I have given more than RM1mil to pay off his debts and he promised he wouldn't do it again,” said his father Hock Meng, 56, yesterday when met at his house in Taman Pelangi. Read more.

It is so sad that a little bit of fun can get so out of control.

Previous (warning) article: When living is tough, prepare to make more spontaneous, bad decisions

How to slaughter a well-formed song on 'moral' reasons with 'creative' sound editing

The guys at Hitz.fm continue to amuse. I say amuse as in to wallow myself in laughter mixed with grief and disbelief.

I have earlier written an entry on Kate Perry's single, I, a female smooched a fellow female and I loved it! because it was liberalising to hear song about hedonistic (lesbianic?) overture being played over our national radiowaves. But good things do not last long, the smooching part was soon edited out to cater to the presumed Malaysian social norm. I wrote that the resultant effect was worse, the edited version sounded even more profane and wrong.

One anon commentor, purportedly someone from Hitz.fm, wrote:

Hey there i'm actually working for hitz.fm and i tell you you won't believe the arguments that we had in the office over this song ever since it got into rotation. Don't get me wrong i totally agree with you that the editing is really unnecessary and it just made the song sounds more vulgar than it is. But then again we do have the local ministry of communication watching our every move(and mind you they really monitor especially US)So when i finally stumble upon this blog than i know that i have a solid ammo to back the fact the the edit is actually making the song sounds more vulgar and i'm not the only 1 that is feeling that way.So i manage to convince them to flip the edit instead.Thank you for bringing up the point of case and actually listening to us. Thanks again.

Anon, you are most welcome. (check out the choice of word ammo, that sounded like a modern gun-culture equivalent of back-stabbing. :P!)

Guess what? The song was changed once again!

This time they left in the word KISS. Instead they muffled out the word girl!! The latest version (heard it yesterday at around 6.30pm) goes like this:

I kissed a muffmuff and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a muffmuff just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a muffmuff and I liked it
I liked it

Sweet idea Hitz.fm. Only if we, the listeners are kids. Everyone can work out what they did. How else do you explain "I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it", "It felt so wrong, it felt so right"? Please don't slaughter a perfectly formed song, just because you like the tune but do not condone the lyric does not make such editing acceptable. It ruins a good song.

:( , besides is it really that wrong to kiss a girl?

I don't go to gay clubs. But I have a feeling this Kate Perry number is a popular hit in those clubs. Can anyone confirm?

If the average chick buys only ONE pair of shoes every year, the money saved could buy her a nice property! SAVE girl, SAVE.

I'd like to share this piece with you...

Women are less likely than men to put money into a savings account regularly, and those who do typically save less.

If you want to kick-start the savings habit, set up a direct debit which deposits a fixed sum into a savings account at the start of each month after pay day.

Don’t be tempted to leave it to the end of the month and see what is left — the chances are you will have spent it already.

Many women want to keep their money in an accessible account, not least because they often have more irregular earning patterns than men, with some taking time out of the workplace to bring up children, for example.

Building a nest egg will give you this flexibility — and if you save into a cash ISA the money is available as and when you need it. If you want, you can always convert this into a pension at a later date, to take advantage of the valuable tax relief.

And don’t rely on meeting Mr Right.

Carrie Bradshaw may have found her Mr Big but how will it turn out in the end?

Don’t bank on finding a ready-made man — start standing on your own two feet now.

If a rich guy does appear, he may be pleased that you’re able to provide for yourself — at least he’ll know you aren’t after him for his money!

DON'T YOU AGREE?

Why being on ping.sg top ten is better than innit top ten

I have nothing against nuffnang's innit (despite my 2-month ban). I still think the world of nuffnang, their courage to go into blogosphere-specific advertising and their latest metered/buffered campaigns (their best effort explanation is commendable, but I am none the wiser what those words mean in mathematical terms, but never mind) . But I won't be too critical, as I have been reminded on numerous occasions to count my blessings, give thanks and don't be an ungrateful bastard. Nuffnang money can feed me with few packets of maggi mee each week till the end of 2008, so I must really be grateful for all their hard work and ability to match appropriate ads to my blog. Thank you.

Now back to the subject title. I have been on ping.sg's and innit's daily top ten most read/pings/nangs with entries on the Sisuahlai blog. But I will now come clean. I get more satisfaction by being on ping.sg most read than on innit's 24hour top 10 table. Why?

If you haven't spotted the obvious, it is the sort of readership you get on ping.sg and the contents on ping.sg top 10. No doubt both have their share of ridiculous no-brainer must read entries that made it to the top, like an entry about a penis in the sea (huh?) and other unmentionable titles.

To cut a long story short, here is a summary why I think being on ping.sg top ten is better, more satisfying than being on its counterpart's daily top ten read...

(1) Just look at ping.sg top ten blog contents. And compare them to the other one. The words petty and trivial comes to mind for one of them, virtually all of the time.

(2) Malaysian and Singaporean blogosphere legitimize the butchering and massacring of the English language. But the equivalent of an English language war-crime is somehow more tolerable on ping.sg. That's a compliment btw.

(3) Ping.sg top ten shows the actual initial portion of the blog entry. So you will find less misleading titles on ping.sg top ten blog entries.

(4) Easier to update and post your blog entry on ping.sg. One is an automatic BMW, the other is a manual gear kereta lembu. Comparatively speaking.

(5) Pleasant lay-out. Ok, I am being pedantic now.

There you go, 5 reasons why i think ping.sg rocks over the other one!

My new favicon

Coldplay New Album (see topless lady on album cover!), Vote of No-Confidence, Experiment with a Blog Template, Russia will win Euro, Brazilian Ladies

The week that was that, and this, and a little bit more of that. I have reverted back to the original Sisuahlai minima black blog template as I could not fix some bugs on the new template, the white background Gecko template. Never mind. I am still looking out for a clean simple bloggerspot template... let me know if you know a good link. Thanks.

Yeah, I (got out and) bought Coldplay's latest album -Viva La Vida. The album was released earlier this month, but we still haven't got a Malaysian release/edition, and thanks to my impatience, and schoolboy eagerness, I simply gave myself no choice but to buy the heavily priced imported CD. I am listening to it now, on repeat as I normally warm to Coldplay stuff only after the 4th or 5th repeat. A bit like listening to church hymms/choir songs, the tunes are not earth-shattering stuff, but it is the mood that makes those rhythm and words so beautiful. You and I know that Coldplay seldom do bubblegum immediates.

Thought processes during several rounds of listening to Coldplay's Viva La Vida:
1st: RM48.50 is not cheap man!
2nd: Hmm... what if I ripped those songs and then return the CD to the shop?
3rd: hey, I can hum to some of the tunes
4th: This is not bad stuff! Be my mirror, my sword, and shield, my missionaries in a foreign field la la la la (i am singing)
5th: let's spread the goodness on my blog!


Now to some zzzz politics. (Boss, satu kopi-o kaw!)

What the heck is SAPP doing? They are ruining my KL Stock Exchange share values. The market is so bearish, the only way now to get quicker investment returns are Euro 2008. No wonder the bookies are smiling, people are flocking to do business with them in times like these! Stealing my biz!! (Btw, SSL does not condone football betting, it is evil... I know that, because Holland lost.)

SAPP's YTL, the side-burn, misai and no-confidence vote

I actually agree with some of SAPP demands. But I don't know about this no-confidence vote motion. I am not so sure removing Pak Lah is the right cure here, because I am worried we might get another M-esque leadership as a replacement. That would be worse, no? We have seen so many positive (re: judicial independence, political transparency & accountability) changes since Pak Lah took over as PM. It does not matter whether those changes are attributed directly to him, or someone else because the take home conclusion is that those changes took place when Pak Lah is PM. So in other words, we are moving towards a fairer and equitable (not necessarily richer) Malaysia, albeit at crawling speed. But at least we are moving to somewhere.

I do seriously hope our politicians can sort things out fast. This political uncertainty is definitely spooking foreign investors from doing business with us. A longer and more protracted political guessing game is never good for anyone, so Anwar (Ku Li, Najib or whoever rocks your political boat) stop the talk and just get on with the walk.

brazilian ladies! a healthy diversionary pic from weary malaysian politics (you can catch some hot brazilian ladies in the new Incredible Hulk movie!!)

Now, back again to my blog template. I am learning to appreciate the importance of a good blog skin. Before, all I want to do is just getting my posts out there. But people are always attracted to aesthetic (check out Brazilian ladies pic, see what I mean), so again if you know a nice and clean template, please let me know so I can upload it to SSL. The keyword is free.

Have a nice week! And good luck Russia.

Revenge of the Thong

Hypothetical scenario. You got yourself a pair of undies, with intricate embroideries and cutesy ornaments. You slipped them on, and for some reason (thigh fatness?), they got tangled on their way up, so you gave a little thug. You pulled it up. And they just would not go further than your flabby mid-upper legs. Damn those thighs undies. They literally got bottle-neck-jammed just above your knees (yes, your legs really do look like inverted champagne bottles). Thugging would tear them apart, so you hobbled your way to the upright mirror. You looked at yourself, not sure to laugh or cry at your ridiculous predicament. What the heck, you muttered, and gave the undies an exasperated last thug. It was indeed the last. They ripped, but not before one of the cutesy ornament sprung away from its attachment and caught your eye. Ouch! At this point, you were more blinded with fury than actual blindness... tears of mixed emotions (confused, angry, embarrassment rolled into one) started welling.

Now what do you do, assuming that you are a sane person? I mean after the swearing has stopped.

Well, something similar actually happened in real life. Maybe not as dramatic as my story, maybe more... I don't know. But one American lady actually took matters to court and sue the thong-manufacturers, Victoria Secrets.

Her attorney said the injury will affect the 'victim of _____ (insert ridiculous adjective here)' for the rest of her life. Now that is dramatic.

Read the full story here, I didn't believe it either at first.

I ****ed a girl and I liked it

If I get paid $1 for making one right prediction each day, I will be living in up in a nice mansion, equipped with 10 maids, 2 drivers and 1000 girlfriends. Ok, a little exaggeration, just 999 girlfriends.

I knew they would be some form of stupid, unnecessary censorship on that Kate Perry's I kissed a girl and I liked it song! Hitz FM had played the raw, uncensored, fat full-cream original version just a couple of weeks ago, and now someone decided to be a smartie and introduced the ridiculous edited fit-for-retards version.

They edited out the kiss part in the song, and it sounded even more vulgar!! Who decided this??

Each time the chorus plays, the song went into some incomprehensible mumble like so...

I (mumblemumble) a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I (mumblemumble) a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I (mumblemumble) a girl and I liked it
I liked it

I asked a friend who unfortunately heard the edited version first before the real deal what that mumble mumbojumbo was supposed to say... and he said FUCK.

I fucked a girl and I liked it!!

This is what ridiculous censorship and unnecessary editing do to songs. Just leave it as it is, otherwise don't bother playing it!! Idiots.

When living is tough, prepare to make more spontaneous, bad decisions

The average RM3000 income per household (one working dad, one full-time homemaker mom, 2 pesky kids) just isn't enough. It is all good if they reduce petrol subsidies and divert the "saved" money to other 'needed' development, but in the meantime, the population have to eat, sleep and crap. We need food and shelter to go on. It is no good telling us that the extra petrol money will go to some other future development, we need to live now.

We seriously need better economic solutions in place of the subsidy reduction. And I am not seeing any, even after I have put on my astigmatism-corrective glasses. Tadak. Bo. Nada.

Don't compare us to Europe or America who are paying market price for their oil. First, they don't produce as much oil per population like Malaysia, second their living standards and income are way ahead than us. Why am I feeling that the Malaysian living standard is regressing? Why are the majority of us just earn enough to get by, when the beloved politicians can afford big houses and a lux lifestyle abroad?

Where did we go so wrong?!

Best Natural Contraceptive

"I remember looking at a photo of a naked man with friends and screaming, saying I didn't want to get married!"

says Vivien Oh, secretary of the Selangor and Federal Territory of KL Family Planning Group (check out NST, 18 June, Streets page 8)

...I cannot recall a more memorable quote than this one. This will stick in my head for days if not months to come. I wonder what else turns her off?

He he.

8 out of 10 bloggers will stop blogging in less than 6 months of starting a blog

Bloggers are a fickle bunch. Most of you cannot sustain an interest beyond six months. Bloggers would need to have fresh ideas on such frequent basis that the majority just drop off and give up writing or realise what's the idiotic point of this, whichever comes first. Some of you hide behind the hiatus concept supposedly in the process of plotting the next move when actually you are telling readers you are tired and writhing in blogger's block pain. Here are some helpful advice to keep your blog going... like steroids for loss appetite, like morphine in your terminal hours:

(1) Lower your standards and plagiarise
Quality blog entry is in fact a product of your over-worked imagination. I say better to write rubbish than to keep searching for that perfect entry for weeks on end. Copy, copy, copy.

(2) Write an entry about blogging and the blogosphere
Like this.

(3) What did you wear to school/work today?
That is an entry already. Write a story behind your choice and then watch your readership plummets. So what, who gives a damn... as long as you keep writing and don't die a quick blogging death.

(4) Post Pictures. Of yourself. In various comical poses.
Easy as ABC.

(5) Reassure yourself that one day you will find your blogging form and start posting quality entry after another, but in the meantime you are quite happy to settle for crap writing, but at least you are still an active blogger.

Whatever you do - just write. Don't be a blog-dropout.

Times are tough

Wah? Last I heard, God had never given us a chance to commission Him (or Her) to work for us. Maybe my idea of God is rather different to this housewife's...

Housewife: We depend on God to help our family

PETALING JAYA: With three school-going children, housewife Joyce Tay is “depending on God” to make ends meet as her household income of RM3,000 is no longer sufficient (read more...).

Times are indeed tough.

Eating in school canteen can save you a lot of money in these inflationary times

My head is still spinning from too much football. Anyway, found an idea that you might like, or at least consider. I am sure you are not the only one feeling that everything has gone up in price. These were the far-reaching consequences I was referring to, this RM2.70 per litre affects almost all aspects of our money-spending lives.

Ok, here is this idea. You have 4 to 5 friends whom you promise to take out for lunch. This promise was made well before the petrol price hike announcement. There is really no escape but to "pay". But how do you soften the blow, so to speak?

TWO WORDS my friend: SCHOOL CANTEEN. They are still selling their char kueh teow at RM1.70. The last time I paid this much for my kueh teow was before America went to war with Iraq (the first one!), and that was a long time ago.

Go, eat at school canteens, they are still selling at pre-war prices.

(To salary-earning adults: fantastic idea if you don't mind the kiddie portion and those noisy sweaty kids... but just a short note, I am sure there is an ethical issue somewhere...hmm, somewhere)

Searching for that blog home-run...

I haven't been blogging lately. A lot of the (recent) stuff you read here are regurgitated materials I randomly picked up from the net. This must be immensely boring... apologies. My brain is slowing down, must be the late night European football. How many of you here watch football? How do you freshen up for work/school the next day? Coffee and tea are only helping me so much. I have been reading a lot of political blogs and those too are starting to bore. The only reason I can stay awake at work is because I have been hitting home runs after home runs at the stock market front (home runs here means not losing money and making a little, because our stock market is an underachiever in the world of stock markets!). I don't do trades, I am the middle-person, or the bad guy. I handle other people's trades and dispense advice. Yawn... even writing these are getting tedious...

Give me a few days... I will try to come up with something slightly more readable and something vaguely more interesting.

Baby born with penis at the back

OMG. A baby was born with an extra appendage. Stuck to the torso, at the BACK!

We should not be laughing at this kind of thing. The rare condition is called fetus in fetu. The doctor spent three hours removing it. And this is no april's fools...

I kissed a girl and I liked it

This is one of my best minimal-blogging weeks. Truth be told, I am running low on blog ideas, the only saving grace is that those ideas do not cost RM2.70 per litre, but then again they are not as ubiquitous as those Petronas gas stations. But I'm happy, that is the bottom line. And I am doubly happy today because I heard this song - I KISSED A GIRL AND I LIKED IT - sang by a girl.

I heard it first on hitz.fm. I guessed the authority have not sussed out the lesbianic innuendos in this one. For non-Malaysians, gayism is frown upon here. Boo. So to hear this song played over our air-waves is liberalising and nice.

Maybe this is the sort of change Malaysians should also be asking for, apart from just political ones.

Katy Perry - I Kissed A Girl

This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It’s not what, I’m used to
Just wanna try you on
I’m curious for you
Caught my attention

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

No, I don’t even know your name
It doesn’t matter
Your my experimental game
Just human nature
It’s not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

Us girls we are so magical
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain’t no big deal, it’s innocent

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

Go green (in the face): hybrid cars in Malaysia

Will the government provide tax incentives for those wishing to import hybrid cars?

Or at least get our local car producers boys to make one!!

I cannot get rid of this thought, I might as well share it with you. Imagine this... 10 years from now.

Proton Hybrid... moving nicely along Jalan Ampang and then ground to a sudden halt!

Pedestrian,"A(pa)sal?" (What happen?)

Driver,"Minyak ta-dak. Karan putus." (Out of petrol. Electric shortage.)

Pedestrian,"Kereta apa ni?" (What car is this?)

Driver,"Proton Petronas-Tenaga Hybrid."

hybrid car in Malaysia

Blogs that I read daily and why 70% of you are obsessed with your blog traffic

I am first a blog-reader. Then a blogger. Since it is Thursday evening, and I have completed my evening work (job that pays me more than my 9-5 work! I like), I will share with you some of my personal blog favourites, stuff that I read on a daily basis. Some of them, I am going to admit, I even hit the refresh button a few hours apart just to see new comments or new entries. Because they are that great...

1. Salvatore Dali
He has a weekly column in the Star, which has a more regulated writing style than his punchy blog entries. His opinions and investment ideas are way more convincing, more superior and more readable than the bland stuff you get in the local business pages. He does not give you the obvious and he sees beyond the black and white. God bless him for making my day less boring - and in my book, he is the best Malaysian financial blogger. He updates daily (almost).

2. Marina Mahathir
She writes better than her dad. Now that I reside in KL, I can share and appreciate some of her grievances and pain of being a KLite (she is a Bangsarian). She is passionate, in sensible doses I should add, about feminist issues and anything to do with HIV awareness in Malaysia. A lot of her commentors wished her blog was more political, but she is smart enough to know that she needs to be consistent and you cannot do that by having political sides. She was not even in UMNO to begin with. Now that is NEUTRAL.

3. Kenny Sia
To get fashion tips. :P

4. Sisuahlai
To check my traffic, just like 70% of dumbass bloggers (sidenote: my non-stat checking sis uses a lot of dumbasses and any word that ends with asses). I am one of them but so far this week I have been a good boy - no traffic checking for the last 3 hours...

Why do we keep checking our stupid stats for??

I guess it is to do with this: Attention = Blog traffic. We like to know people are paying attention to us. Pathetic! And I am guilty of this.

have a good weekend
(and I need a rehab for stat-checking neurosis)

Creative ideas to fight increasing petrol price

My kopitiam conversation this morning was like any other kopitiam conversations all over Malaysia on June 5. It was all about the petrol price. RM0.78 a litre overnight price hike is steep for the average income earners and the effects are far-reaching. People are not just thinking of alternative transport plans/finding more short-cut routes/car-pooling with the neighbour you once hate/hybrid car, they are already re-scheduling baby plans, cutting down on beers, and finding cheaper pastime (the poor man's hobby - blogging?).

I say we work harder to fleece find money from legitimate sources, and to stand on our own two feet. I do not think employers will be too generous come the year end. They are also feeling it, they have few families to feed and holidays pre-booked months ago.

Profits (unless you are Mr and Mrs Petronas) will be thinner, and who will suffer more? You the workers.

So what will you do? What creative ideas do you have?

my fav flatscreen "LCD"

Here are some money-saving tips to help you through tough times:

1. Turn off the television. Fight the (advertisement) influence.
2. Write a list before you go shopping - and stick to it.
3. Invite friends over instead of going out - let them be the ones who pay for petrol.
   
4. Instead of throwing out some damaged clothing, repair it instead. Sewing is fun. Not.
5. Drink more water. Beer, water, beer, water, beer, water. They all the same. Really.
6. Give up expensive habits, like cigarettes and alcohol. And driving.
7. Get books, music, and movies cheaply on the internet - P2P is king.
8. Hide your credit cards and count to 10. No, hide yourself instead, let the credit cards find you.
9. Do a price comparison - and find a cheaper store, Ebay price is always a good guide.
10. Join up with a volunteer program.
11. Use a simple razor to shave. It is 5% razor, 95% technique.
12. Buy staples in bulk.

RM1.92 a litre no more?

The Malaysian government is about to announce a "new fuel subsidy scheme", and that bicycle idea is looking ever so attractive now...

I Love Bahasa Ad (Warning: Really Explicit Content)

This advertorial content gets more imaginative and more explicit the further you read... but it is damn fun and very addictive read. I found this link on RPK. And this is easily the best bahasa online ad ever, ever.

I am glad I still know my bahasa, because this ad is hilarious. Or as they say in bahasa, lucu gile.

Let me give you my best effort translation (my comments in bracket):

www."majestichusband".com
Do you feel defeated before the (intercourse) battle?
If the answer is yes, from today on, it will be your wife's turn to taste defeat whilst feeling satisfied doing battle with you! (sorry for the lousy inggeris, I am translating word for word here)

THIS PRODUCT IS INTENDED FOR MARRIED COUPLES ONLY. (a very malaysian disclaimer)

Do you frequently do sex but spurt a little too early?

Do not worry, after (using) this, you will be able to battle up to 8 hours long with Dear Mrs.

That's provided you still have the energy after the exhausting dive to the base looking for the real pleasure hole/depth.

(achtung)!

This is solely intended for couples who are already married. The Management will not assume responsibility for any product misuse such as in free sex and the likes!

Surely you have trouble with intimate relationship, otherwise why would you spend your time with me (reading this) in search for the best solution.

Yes, there is definitely a best solution for you to maintain domestic harmony. Physical intimacy is like paradise on earth with no equivalents.

This is a gift from God to us, of the highest value. Why do I say so? You know the answer (wink, wink)

According to male sexual potential research statistics, 7 out of 10 males have problem with rapid climax.

What do I mean with rapid climax, or in its scientific term "Premature Ejaculation"?

It means you will experience sperm spurts before the right time, and this is caused by:

• overly anxious mind with no control
• sensitive and excessive ticklishness on the cock
• health problems

A lot of males are not aware of this deficiency. Intercourse that takes 5-15 minutes is satisfactory for them and they are contented after spurting inside the wife's vagina.

Do you know 78% of women do not climax during intercourse with their partners (who else!)?


Is your wife part of these statistics?

YES (the author answers for us???), if you only manage to sail within 5-15 minutes only and then sink in the ocean of love-making, it is not impossible if your wife did not reach the appropriate climax.

(Enough, I cannot take it anymore!)

.... the advert gets more explicit! I should stop... read here if you want to find out more about this oil.

:) Long live bahasa copywriters. I like.

Key to Happiness: Strong Family Ties and Absence of Materialism

Island life can be scary or happy. The scary ones are full of tourist trappings, idle beach boys and special massages. Take this as an example, today's news, a group fight broke out simply because a boy "bumped" a girl in a club in Pulau Redang. The Malaysian (theStar I mean) definition of bumping is dancing too closely until the hips meet, uninvitingly of course. Not the other more intimate meaning of bumping.

A simple bump is enough to set-off a cowboy bar scene melee - what kind of idyllic island mentality is this? I think life must be pretty tough for both holiday goers and island residents, it must be for anyone to take a bumping incident so seriously and to such violent conclusion.

"10 policemen were rushed to the island on a speedboat to handle the situation." - even the police didn't expect this: a free outing to the holiday island!!


Now contrast this with the island people of Vanuatu. Their island country has been voted the happiest place in the world. Their recipe for happiness: strong family ties and absence of gangsta rap and bumping action materialism. This is not exactly a capitalist's idea of happiness, and furthermore I do not think the Malaysian and Singaporean governments would be too happy if their kids start adopting such simpleton thinking.

We have been told that our idea of happiness/success (interchangeable) should be about fighting for our people and becoming world beaters in economic terms.

Sien already.

I say it is about using coconut oil as fuel and catching fruit bats for dinner... life is happier and more peaceful that way! And when the kids demand for a 50-inch LCD, I say construct a bamboo frame, take it to the beach, stick it into the sand and get the kids to look right through it.

Lastly, stay together. Marriage means life. Just like murder without parole in UK.